Wisconsin Democrats Stunned to Discover Democracy *Might* Allow Them to Win

In a development that has sent shockwaves through the very foundations of American political science, Wisconsin Democrats are reportedly grappling with the perplexing notion that a fair electoral map could, theoretically, result in their party actually winning elections. For years, the state's legislative districts were so meticulously sculpted, so geometrically avant-garde, that one could practically trace the outline of a sitting Republican congressman's personal yacht with them. Now, with the Supreme Court's unexpected declaration that 'voter participation *should* have some bearing on election outcomes,' Democrats find themselves in the bewildering position of having to actually *campaign* rather than simply lamenting the inevitable. \n\nLocal pundits, who had long since retired their 'What If?' scenarios for Wisconsin politics, are scrambling to recall basic democratic principles. 'It's like finding out the game isn't rigged for the house after all,' whispered one visibly disoriented political analyst, adjusting his 'Make America Geriatric Again' baseball cap. The sudden influx of competitive districts means politicians will have to interact with actual constituents, a jarring prospect for those who had grown accustomed to only conversing with strategically placed mailboxes. \n\nObservers anticipate a surge in awkward 'door-knocking' incidents, with candidates accidentally asking homeowners if they're registered to vote in the 'Greater Badger State Republican Enrichment Zone, Sub-District Gamma.' Experts warn that if this 'democracy' trend continues, Wisconsin might even start resembling a state where the will of the people isn't determined by an algorithm designed to make a salamander's shape look symmetrical.