Asian 'Silicon Sweatshops' Finally Get Their Due: 'Not Just Good For Cheap Phones Anymore,' Says Enthusiastic Data Center

It appears the West, in its boundless magnanimity, has finally acknowledged Asia's singular talent for manufacturing the tiny, intricate bits that make our increasingly sentient digital overlords hum. The long-sizzling "A.I. Boom," a phrase now uttered in hushed, reverent tones usually reserved for cult leaders or the last slice of pizza, has miraculously illuminated the forgotten truth: the stuff inside the boxes has to come from *somewhere*. Industry analysts, reportedly dizzy from attempting to graph an exponential curve into orbit, claim this newfound appreciation for Asian chip companies is a "shift in the balance of tech power." This is, of course, a delightful euphemism for when the folks who *design* the future realize they still require the folks who *assemble* the future with microscopic precision, often in conditions that make a Dickensian factory floor look like a mindfulness retreat. Indeed, one unnamed data center, reportedly feeling 'an insatiable hunger for processing power,' was heard to exclaim, 'We knew they were good for making affordable handsets, but *this*? This is a revelation!' The global economy, ever the graceful ballerina, continues its delicate pirouette of dependency.